I recently read this blog post: “To Weep with those who weep.” …. It is written by a man, Luke Parrott, whose sister Lindsey had 2 terminal pregnancies in 15 months. Each baby girl, lived 10-12 hours before passing away. I think that his words are VERY MUCH NECESSARY. (below is an excerpt, emphases mine, and the link to the full post is at the bottom). :
There is one shared experience of the entire human race that should unite us but deeply divides us all. It is a socio-emotional factor. It is the common experience of pain. Pain can be an invitation to embrace others but it is more commonly used as a way of distancing.
It wasn’t until I watched my own sister and brother-in-law walk through two terminal pregnancies in the last 20 months, that I have felt the anguish of pain, suffering, and death. I have held my only two nieces in my arms for only a few minutes each. I have only held them both two times. Once when they were full of life. Once when they had passed on to death.
In this grief of my own, I have become deeply sensitized to the grief of others. All pain and suffering is different for each human. We cannot really know what the other is experiencing. But our pain feels the same. Our grief rips us both apart inside. Our tears are the same.
Nothing is more painful for a grieving heart than to experience it alone. And nothing is more painful for a grieving heart than to see others distance themselves from your pain. What pain needs is very simple: presence. And that presence does not need any words. It just needs to share in the pain.
I have now learned that when I hear pain, I choose to listen. When I hear suffering, I want to be present. When I observe grief, I want to partake. Because that is what I have needed in my life during this season. I don’t want to sleep through someone else’s suffering. I want to be there with them. Fully present. Weeping as well.
Jesus weeps with us in our pain as he did with Mary. He invites us to weep with Him. And as we weep with Him, we realize we are weeping also with those who are in pain. Those who suffer. Those in grief. To follow Jesus is to enter suffering. It is to be present in pain. It is to stand in solidarity with the one who weeps. To ‘weep with those who weep’ is to weep with Jesus himself.
I wonder if we can only find unity in our humanity if we are willing to weep together. To enter one another’s pain. I think my country and our world needs this more than ever now. Do we have the courage and vulnerability to enter the pain of others (even if we don’t understand it), grieve together, and allow that pain to be transformed into something new—for both of us?